October 15, 2007

Saturday Camryn had soccer pictures at 9am and then a game immediately following. We missed the pictures because they weren't at the same spot they were last year and no one informed me that the location had changed. So we just hung out on the playground with another family until it was time for her game. When it was time to start heading down for the game she ran off with the other family and left me behind dealing with the other 2 little ones. At Calvary there are about 100 soccer games all going on at once and apparently she wasn't playing on her usual field so when she ran off with the other family I couldn't find them. Courtlyn was crying in her stroller so I ended up holding her while I pushed the stroller with the other arm. Dylan couldn't keep up with me so he was whining the whole time. We walked up and down the fields 5 times looking for her when I finally gave up. I sat by a fence and started feeding Courtlyn, about that time Dylan started crying, and so did I. I was so completely overwhelmed. We missed pictures, now I couldn't find her, Dylan and Courtlyn were being difficult, and of course when things start getting bad the first thing I think about is Joe, and and how things would be so much better if he was here. So as I sat in the dirt crying, I looked up and spotted Camryn's team. I finished feeding Courtlyn, gained my composure, and went to see the last half of her game.

When we left we headed to the doctor because Camryn had been bit by a spider again. Except this time she had 3 bites. The one on her leg was swollen to the point that I don't know how she was even able to walk. So we went to the doctor and she was given a shot, put on antibiotics, and an antihistamine. When we left there I took them back to Calvary for the homecoming carnival. Surprisingly, that went extrememly well.... the kids had the best time.

As far as I can remember, yesterday was pretty uneventful. We went to church, and out to eat lunch. When we came home the kids played outside until 7pm. Our neighbors brought them hotdogs for dinner so I didn't even have to worry about cooking.

But last night I stayed up ALL night. I have not done that since college. I am way too old for that, especially seeing as I have three kids to take care of. But regardless, I did it. I ironed a ton of clothes, cleaned bathrooms, did laundry, and anything else I could find to do. At 6:45am I was about to go in to get the kids up when Courtlyn started crying. So I decided to feed her before I got Camryn and Dylan up. I sat down in the rocking chair with her and of course I fell sound asleep. Dylan woke me up at 7:20. We should have already been out the door to get Camryn to school. So I threw the kids in the car as fast as I could, but we still got there late. Here I am staying up all night and we're still late!

Then I took Courtlyn and Dylan to Walgreens to drop off a prescription and pick up some pictures. When we left I couldn't find my keys. I knew they weren't locked in the car so they had to be inside the store. But no one could find them. So I called Pop-a-Lock because I knew I had a spare key inside the car. The whole time we waited for the guy to get there Courtlyn was screaming. My head was pounding from her and from the lack of sleep. He finally gets there, I pay him $35 and he left. I start to get in the car and the alarm starts going off. I can't turn it off though because I don't have the remote....its lost with my keys inside Walgreens. Dylan starts freaking out because of the noise and he was literally running away through the parking lot. Luckily a nice lady caught him for me. It finally stopped, but I knew if I tried again it would set the alarm off again. So I called my sister who decided to call the Honda dealership. As I was on the phone with her an employee from Walgreens came out and told me my husband was on the phone. What? My husband? He's calling from heaven? I looked at her and told her it couldn't be my husband. She insisted though. So I told her my husband was dead. You should have seen her face. She apologized repeatedly. Come to find out it was my dad. Its not like things weren't bad enough...but now it was thrown in my face as a reminder that Joe was not here to help me out of this mess. Eventually Honda was able to tell me how to disarm the alarm. I went back in the store one more time to look for the keys and guess what was sitting right there on the Halloween aisle, right in plain sight? My keys! So I wasted 3 hours and $35 for nothing. And since Camryn is only in half day kindergarten it was already time to pick her up.

The rest of the day was actually pretty low key. The kids played outside in the rain most of the time, and Camryn's soccer game was cancelled.

I've come to the conclusion that most of my problems are related to not getting enough sleep. I haven't slept normally since Joe died a year ago. And considering that I chase after 3 young kids all day, sleep is a requirement. So I think I'm going to try and get something to help me sleep. I was given a prescription of ambien when I was pregnant but I didn't like it, and I really don't feel comfortable taking something that strong with a 4 month old to take care of.

In Camryn's kindergarten class they pray everyday and the teacher lets them make prayer requests. Today Camryn said she asked her teacher to pray for me to be able to sleep again. I hope God heard her prayer because I'm deperate here.