March 5, 2007

Its been four months since Joe died. If you do the math, its been 172,800 minutes, and I don't think a minute has passed that I'm not consumed by it. Not a minute has passed that I don't think about him....whether it be memories we shared together, or the accident, or just simply thinking about the fact that he's gone. It doesn't matter what I'm doing at the time....eating, driving, giving the kids a bath, talking on the phone, reading the kids a book, sitting in church, or anything else.....my mind is still preoccupied with thoughts of him. I'm still not sleeping....I stay up half the night and when I finally do go to bed, I toss and turn all night....still thinking about him. I would love to have just one minute of happiness again. One minute of letting all this go.